My Farmer and Me…A minor Intervention…

Ethel and Ed_nThursday evening and yesterday proved to be a turning point in this journey…

Ed fell during the night on Thursday and again yesterday afternoon after we returned from our Dairy Bar late afternoon lunch!

I believe he tries to make this walking with a walker thing look easier than it is…going at a quick pace is not good, nor is trying to prove it’s okay!!!

Yes, I know I do not know all that he’s going through but I see these trials as having no compromise…no more scurrying around like you are a superhero on a mission…no need to prove anything to any of us.

So with a bit of apprehension I mentioned my concerns to two of the boys that happened to be here at the time I was tearing my hair out!

In no uncertain terms was it a pleasant situation…Chad and his wife Kate were here and voiced their concerns to  the Farmer … there is no good that can come from falling repeatedly.

Jeremy and his wife Allison listened while I tried to get across the fact that I am fearful that one of these times it could cause a broken hip…a hit to the noggin…or worse.

That is when Jeremy spoke up and without pulling any punches, took on the roll of advocate for his Dad. He sees things through the eyes of someone who has been there..

Waking from an induced coma of 40 days he was totally dependent on nurses and doctors in 1997 at the age of 18.  He was kind of going through the same feelings as his dad is now…only in reverse…

He would get better and be less dependent…my Farmer will require more help as time goes on…he will continue to decline as hard as it is to admit.

Our conversation turned to just that…honesty and facts…through Jeremy’s eyes and because of his experience.

Chad was seeing things through a son’s eyes as I do through my wife’s eyes. How can we help him through this?

With everyone’s help thrown into the mix, it was not as hard a situation as I had envisioned. Kate and Allison added their take on the situation and it was decided that help was needed during the hours of perhaps 11 p.m. to 6 a.m….not every evening, just as a relief effort.

I am going to  notify the Visiting Nurses that we do need help…he is getting up and falling during the night. No excuses from them about lack of time for a visit…that is their job.

This is step one into another phase of our journey. I have come to understand that this could very well be a “reason” for Jeremy’s accident…to help us understand what his Dad is facing and feeling.

I think all of our children have a purpose in this…I just feel now I have some answers to questions from all those years ago.  my biggest question now would be, “When did our kid’s grow up to be such great adults? BUT…thank God they did.

I have a feeling that there will be more of these ‘ interventions ‘ but hopefully will become a bit less challenging. We have a strong family…in ways I never really thought about…but now we can all work together to make this journey a bit more bearable???

My Farmer is moving with a little more thought and purpose…slow(er) and more careful steps I have noticed!!!

My Farmer and Me…Lifting spirits!!!

As I noted on the blog, my Farmer had a rough night…up every hour and slipped off the bed and dragged the side of his head down the radio stand. (I really don’t see how he did it, but I did find him on the floor at the other end of the bed!)

I did not hear him moving in the bed or the walker being touched which usually wakes me right up.  I sleep just inside the next room with a wide, open doorway) He is adamant about having the radio close to his bed so he can adjust the volume when the Yankees are playing.

We had the furnace repairman coming also, and given the amount of rest he got we postponed  our lunch with Jon and Maria… He rested until about 3 p.m. and then we went for lunch.

He seemed much more like himself  and appeared to enjoy his meal. He actually got silly, as you can see!!! All is good!

My Farmer and Me… Going forward…

Resting with Ophelia..._nOphelia seems to have taken Ed on as a companion. He lays with him quite a bit and when he gets up to head for the bathroom she jumps up on the chair at the table and speaks for a treat.

Yesterday was a good day…got the crops reported at FSA along with signing up for the MPP program. My Farmer had a great conversation with the women i the office and caught up on a bit of County news.

After that he wanted some soft ice cream so we went to Ice Cream Mann’s shop. About mid-way through his dish he said he was getting tired and wanted to go home. I put another errand on hold for a couple of days. No biggie.

The big guy, Jon, came by later in the day with a different easel for Ed and also worked on a video with my Farmer.

My body tells me I am sleep deprived…When he goes to bed I hear every sound that Ed makes…make sure he gets to bathroom. Last night was long…up 9 times.

I missed one trip and he called out to me, but just prior to that he had slid off the bed . He bruised the side of his head on the radio stand…I did hear that and jumped right up.

For the most part, he was angry at himself. I say he is trying to move too fast; whether it be on the bed or walking around with just his cane or nothing at all. Have to admit that he is using the walker this morning.

Chad has taken the morning to go to Fulton and an auction to pick up a bale chopper, hopefully!!! will use it to chop up hay for bedding in the free stall. The Lord willing he will come home with it and perhaps a couple of other things, too.

KaSnee's bull baby nKaSnee’s baby bull. He is very alert and Cooper fed him last evening and he is a great drinker. Sometime’s the babies can be frustrated when first learning to drink  from a bottle but this little devil took to it easily!

Putz and Grissom_nAlso, Putz and Grissom have found another woodchuck behind the bull calf building and have dug halfway to China. Putz was totally in the hole … at one point I could have sworn she was miles away, barking ….. and Grissom gets in up to his butt. I went out and finally got them to walk away but we’ll see how long that works!

The Farmer is up and walking so gotta go… will try to write again later!

Bejosh Ladies

Earlier today KaSnee had a bull calf with the help of Chad and Jordan so by mid-morning I went out to check on the Mama and make sure she was doing ok.

I was struck by the number of Swiss we now have in the herd…not sure how many are Classy Creek animals (Chad and Kate’s); although I believe there is only 2-3 of their animals here.

They all seemed contented and happy; they can go in and out of the free stall barn on their own which sometimes makes a difference in milk production! Happy cows…happy Farmer!!!

The Journey — He is having a good day!!!

My Farmer is a happy guy today. So much so that Jordan told his mother (Kate) that he thought Grampy might be high!!!

My thought is that he is getting deliveries of that wacky tobacco during the night or that he may be possessed! What do you think?

I am ever so thankful for him having days like this…After working so hard for 65 years (well maybe 60) and being taken down by this disease so suddenly, he could be a broken man. But not my Farmer…he finds a bit of happiness where he can and runs with it.

Lately his happy moments include family and friends…drawing and writing. I am hoping he will use his motorized chair today or at least in the near future; I am sure that will give me a chuckle knowing the little kid in him will most certainly come out…Vroom, Vroom!!!

My Farmer and Me…Gratitude

bejosh grinding stoneOver the past couple of days I have received over 300 emails and comments on the blog regarding the post about my frustration being caregiver to my Farmer.

I felt I needed to vent and did so through the blog, which perhaps was not the proper way to deal with it.

However, the messages of encouragement and concern have been overwhelming me and lifting my spirits immensely.

I am not alone in this as I know and so many people I haven’t even met are making such a difference in my day to day life.

If any of you are in the area and would like to stop by please feel free to do so; all I ask is that you call and/or text to  give a head’s up. For the most part we welcome any and all who want to visit. It means a great deal to all of us, especially the Farmer. But if for some reason it wouldn’t be a good day to visit I can let you know.

# 518-744-5488 or email is   I do not always pick up the phone but do check messages every few minutes.

I cannot possibly reply to all of your kind messages but please know that they are touching my heart and have created a calming effect for me. I try not to be a whiner but I probably do come across as being one. You are welcome to tell me to go to my room and put my big girl pants on if you’d like!!!LOL

You are all my friends that I haven’t met yet…just hope someday I will!!! XO

P.S.  LoAnn Sanders if you are coming to Cambridge for any reason, please swing by Bejosh Farm. Jon and Maria told me you come this direction once in a while.